The word from Denise for Six Sentence Stories this week is “safety” and though we all have grave concerns about the safety of our loved ones and ourselves, I am taking a break from all that. But don’t expect sunshine and rainbows. Go to GirlieOntheEdge for inspiration and the link up button to share your own six sentences and to read others’. Extra points if you pick up on the recent prompt words included in this Six.
The door shut against the snowstorm, Bill and Harry first removed the clips from their deer rifles, opened the actions before leaning them in the corner, their routine, a common sense courtesy, as their dad would say.
“Aaron,” Bill asked as he went about getting the fire going, “You gonna put your things away, maybe lend a hand?”
But Aaron didn’t say anything, just laid back on one of the bunks in the small one-room deer camp, still with his boots on, his rifle lying beside him, and the brothers just shrugged, didn’t question him further as they spread their coats and wool pants out to dry.
As he scooped canned beans into the cast iron pan Bill shot his brother a glance that chastised him for his pity invite to their awkward neighbor, but Harry was like their dad, always feeling bad for Aaron and his hard luck mother, always reaching out though most often they were rebuked.
Warmed by the fire and filled up on bread and beans, the brothers yawned and stretched in their long johns, sleepily teased Aaron about taking a gun to bed though he’d never chambered his cartridge, crawled into their sleeping bags, and were soon snoring.
Bill and Harry awakened at the same time, hearing the click of the safety even over the buffeting of the snow squall.
Does that last sentence mean trouble.?~
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Probably. It’s Aaron clicking off the safety catch on his rifle.
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Uh oh!
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Love it!
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You knew what that click was.
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Dude(tte)!*
yow
*compliment on a story that quietly insinuates danger, whispers of threat approaching and, then, when you think you’ve made it out of the story (to the end) …drops a velvet anvil on the reader. nicely done
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Velvet anvil… nice, thank you.
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Oh, that unmistakeable sound. Well done!
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Yes, it’s not what you want to hear in those close quarters.
Thanks.
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Yikes! Will this be continued?
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This will probably remain at “Yikes”. We can only imagine what happens next.
Thank you for reading!
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Didn’t see that coming! An intense ending created by a few simple words. The set up was perfect.
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Thank you. It was a fun change. Did you see the past three prompts tucked in there?
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I caught the first one right away and then saw another but… didn’t see the 3rd, lol. (sh-h don’t let anyone know 😀 )
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oops… 🙂
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You got a lot done in just 6 sentences! Great foreshadowing. Nicely done.
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Thank you. I’ve gotten better since you first got me started on six sentences. It’s great to see you.
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Ominous…(K)
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Yes. Click.
Thanks!
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memadtwo beat me to the punch. OMINOUS for sure…and BTW, great minds. I went to the same place.
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I’m headed over now.
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That last line was spine tingling and not in a good way. But wait, maybe he was just heading out to do a little early morning hunting. Hope, hope.
Great job of taking our thoughts away from the other frightening thoughts surrounding our lives.
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Thank you Pat. I needed to write something different and not about… you know, so why not a crazed camper? Good old fashioned fun.
Thanks!
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Wow! That’s a cliffhanger if there ever was one! Nice!
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Thanks. But if you think about it, nothing really happens in this story. 🤔
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I don’t think I’m gonna like how this story is going to end.
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Then I’ll just leave it there.
Thanks for the read! Hope you’re doing okay.
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🙂 Hanging in there. So far so good.
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Good lead to the end. Yikes! Indeed!
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A sound the boys recognize, and not one they want to hear in the dark of night in camp.
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Great scene setting and a mood that creeps to a pretty devastating possibilty.
I spotted at least one previous cue word 🙂
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Ah, a bonus point for you! Thank you for your kind comments. So fun to leave you readers with that devastating possibility. But who knows, maybe I’ll relieve these characters of their predicament with the next prompt.
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Whoa. Good one. Nothing I love more than a story that leaves me to my own devices. My favorite kind!
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So happy to provide. Thanks for coming by.
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That’s a sound to wake you up quick.
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